Lamby's
Magic Eyecap Wisdom 2007-2009
A Collection of Wise Sayings, Random
Commentary &
Daily Holiday Ramblings
I have a say today because today I have a say!
So, grab a Lamb and listen. Have a seat on the soft meadows and take off your shoes and feel them grasses tickle in between your toes and hoofs.
"Cuffs Make the Pants"If you're gonna get brand new pants, better ask for ones with cuffs. Sometimes, cuffs make the pants—that’s what I always say. "One Good Eye"This Lamb only has one good eye, but like I always say, a one-eyed Lamb is better than a hay penny in a two-handed bird bush. "Poot a Little Poot"People need hugs nowadays, so if somebody asks you for hugs, hug them hard, even if they poot a little poot. That's okay if they do because it’s a poot from love, and smelly love's better than no love. "Sleep Off the Cranky"If you can't say something nice, better take a nap and sleep off the cranky. Naps make you wake up sweeter to be with, which is like kisses, but without smacky wet sounds and stinky breath. "Making Snow Angels"If you ever see a Lamb making snow angels, you better not interrupt 'cause you just might make pack-a-lips happen on accident. "Sweet Words"If someone says they love you, say something sweet, such as these words: 'Why, thank you for the love you say, for I also love you too as well.' If you don't happen to love them back too much, it's best to say nothing. "Don't Buy Gnomes"If you put just one gnome in the yard, he will eat things he shouldn't eat. All the singing in the trees will go away and that gnome'll keep burping out feathers. Leave gnomes alone, especially K-mart gnomes. "Shark Pants"If things don't wear pants - bugs, snakes & gnomes - you'll probably have nightmares. Witches and sharks don't wear pants either, but you don't have to worry about them until Halloween comes or you fall off a boat. |
"Sneaky Gnomes"A gnome will sneak into your house at night and sit on you. If you wake up stinky, that's because he left something in your bed and you were cuddling with it like a brown sock monkey. "Stop Eating Lambs"Dreamlambs are best for sleep times because they keep kids safe until morning. STOP EATING LAMBS so all kids can have one. Besides, only Lambs do karate chops to creepy things in the middle of the night. "Meadow Grasses"If you fall down on meadow grasses, maybe you were supposed to rest anyways. After a nap, you can have a picnic because you’re already down there. There's nothing like an accidental picnic, especially if you invite a dancy baby elephant or your favorite red puppy dragon. "Share Them Bubbles"If you have extra things like oats or bubbles or kisses and cuddles, you should share them when a Lamb stops by for a visit. Lambs really love bubbles, so if you blow some bubbles, better share. If you don't, then fits will be thrown, bad things will be said, and then it will be a bad day until naps are taken. "Girls are Tricky"Better not run in the rain with scissors or up a hill with a girl named Jill. If you do, you will fall down, stab yourself, and break your head. Girls are tricky, so to be the most safest, only run with Lambs if it rains. They know where to pounce best. It's far away from falling girls with pails and pointy metal sharp things. "Baby Jesus Wears Lambpants"If you think Baby Jesus didn't wear Lambpants, you’d be wrong. He is the LAMB of God. Mary made him special pants from sky blue Angel hair & fuzzy baby donkey fur. Manger straw was scratchy on newborn baby legs. That's why they were sore and frayed. It even says so in the Bible.
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